The thing is that I don't exactly know where to start.
I guess with the general birth scene. Well, you can imagine how that went; lots of my mom cursing in a Catholic hospital and my granny shushing her because there were nuns around.
If they are hanging out for childbirth, they'd better get used to it.
And then there I was, a tiny, fricken' quiet baby girl. Awesome. Much better than a boy, fo sho. My parents can vouch for that, since my older brother was a demon. He used to pour mom's shampoo down the drain, write on walls and mirrors with her mascara, jump on ketchup bottles, scoop pudding out of the big bowl with his fingers in the middle of the night. Dick.
Well anyway, back to me being the perfect child.
My brother is seven years older than me. My parents probably waited because they were afraid they would unleash another evil. It took about seven years for them to realize that a sibling would ruin him and be the ultimate revenge on his stupid ass.
What thinkers.
I don't remember much from when I was a baby, which is common; they didn't have many stories either. I slept a lot, cried little, and was generally the greatest thing to ever happen to this cursed family.
That's right, they like football. I dig on hockey now and then, but any other sport makes me cry. Unless it's the winter Olympics, then hells yeah!
Anyway, they thought I would save them, but really, it turned into an epic battle between my brother and I that would last twenty years (as I am twenty now and it's still on-going). Bravo, mum, pa, Bravo.
Soon to come: Kindergarten. Oh, what a ride that will be!
I'm serious, Kindergarten was the craziest year of my life: fights, crushes, dragons, flamethrowers... those were the good days!
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